Dining etiquette is definitely a two-way street.

We, as customers, are not always considerate of the people who wait on us in a restaurant. On the other hand, restaurant employees are not always at the top of their games either.

Whether or not we agree with the longstanding system of supplementing the wages of restaurant service people with tips is not an issue, because whatever we say or do is not going to change the fact that their hourly wage is under $5 (minimum wage for tipped employees in Ohio is $4.08, but is as low as $2.13 under federal law). 

Therefore, the men and women who take our orders and bring our food depend on the tips they receive as an essential part of their income.

Not only do they depend on tips, but they also hope that the tables or booths they are assigned to will turn over — and each new group of customers, of course, means more tips.

That brings me to one of my top criticisms of restaurant customers. People who spend far more than the standard eating and drinking time at a table or in a booth probably don’t realize they are cutting into the server’s income.

This opinion is backed by personal experience. In one incident, a 1 o’clock lunch group continued to occupy the table when the dinner hour began at 4 p.m. How many times should a waiter have to ask, “Can I get you something else?” and be told “No thank you.”

Similar frustration festered at other restaurants. One noon lunch stretched to 3 p.m., and at another, the gathering time was 2 p.m. and continued until 5 p.m. — two hours after coffee and dessert.

Such overtime could be tallied as a compliment to the restaurant owner. The late stayers obviously are comfortable, or they wouldn’t spend so much time there. Apologizing or explaining that you had a lot to talk about is not a sufficient reason to hold a table that could have turned two or three times. The only explanation a service person understands is if their tip covers the time, be it two or three times more.

And what should we be tipping these days?

The general rule, according to TripAdvisor, is 15 percent to 20 percent. 

The 15 percent tip indicates the basics of taking the order and delivering it have been covered. 

The 20 percent tip shows that the server has provided extras, including explaining menu additions and listening to dietary needs. Dietary needs today include gluten-free and vegetarian, in addition to medical requirements.

A 10 percent tip given in a full-service restaurant indicates you were unhappy. Restaurant owners who add mandatory tips for large groups are protecting their wait staff from being shortchanged.

While some people ignore tipping at buffets, it is suggested that $1 or $2 per person be left to recognize the wait staff who clear the plates and refill the drinks.

It’s said that you can tell a book by its cover, but you can’t always depend on what you will be served as it is written on a menu. Menu descriptions often take license with lavish adjectives that may or may not be true when the dish is served. You have to wonder if the cooks in the kitchen read the same menu you are given.

One recent example was a vegetable pasta with Alfredo sauce. The $19 price was steep for an entrée sans seafood or meat, but it could be offset by a generous portion of several kinds of vegetables. Not so! The pasta was served with onions and parsley. To say the least, the customer let her disappointment be known. The corrected version included tomatoes, as the menu stated, and carrots and broccoli.

The second recent incident of being served food that didn’t match the menu description prompted a letter of complaint to the out-of-town restaurant, but no reply was received.

The complaint cited the “generous chunk of aged Scottish white cheddar” wasn’t on the lunch plate until it was requested, and that instead of a boiled egg it was a deviled egg; instead of pickled onions, asparagus was substituted, and instead of a warm crusty roll, a cold muffin was served.

To top it off, no custard appeared on what was stated as “traditional British bread pudding served hot with custard.”

Mary Alice Powell is a retired Blade food editor. Contact her at: poseypowell@aol.com.

First Published September 17, 2017, 4:00 a.m.