CLARKSVILLE, Tenn. - The Army brought Erin and Dan Kidd together. And for much of the last seven years, it has kept them apart.
The 29-year-olds met in the ROTC program at Kentucky s Morehead State University. She left the military with a medical discharge, but in many ways, she is still in the Army.
Since their wedding in 1997, Dan Kidd, who is from Sylvania, now a captain with the 101st Airborne Division s 3rd Brigade/187th Infantry Regiment, has been deployed three times. Based at Fort Campbell on the Kentucky-Tennessee line, he was home from Afghanistan just six months before shipping out Feb. 27 to Iraq, where he remains.
Each night before bed, 2-year-old Anna Kidd goes to the refrigerator and kisses his picture. “I yuv you, Daddy,” she says.
Her father was gone when Anna said her first full sentence, and he has missed many firsts for 3-year-old Joseph.
Erin Kidd, raising the children alone and working part-time in marketing for a fast-food company, finds time to run the 187th s “family readiness group,” informing other spouses, cheerleading, and organizing.
Mr. Kidd s aunt, Linda Balusik, keeps a scrapbook of his e-mails at her Toledo home. His grandmother, Ruth Vogelbacher, said the electronic letters provide some comfort.
Ms. Vogelbacher, a Toledo resident whose husband died serving in World War II, said she often worries about her grandson s safety.
“I m scared every day,” she said. “We ve been very anxious for him to come home.”
The unit newsletters that Mrs. Kidd and her husband (mostly she) produced and the Kidds e-mails trace the arc of a long, hard deployment.
Unedited, they also reveal a couple growing stronger in love and war.
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Jan 15 issue of “BATTLEHARD NEWS,” newsletter of Bravo Company, 3rd Battalion/187th Infantry, awaiting orders to ship out:
Dan: “Make contingency plans for a potential deployment, gather and share lessons learned.”
Erin: “The life of a military family is uncertain at times, however it is truly a calling and blessing on the nation that we make the sacrifices we do.”
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Feb. 18 newsletter, shortly after deployment orders:
Erin: “Knowing this time was coming doesn t make it any easier. We can help each other get through this and we can help our spouses concentrate on their jobs if they are not worried about us back home.”
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March 1, first e-mail from Kuwait:
Dan: “We finally made it here. ... It does not seem like we will be here for very long but I cannot say for sure.”
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March 16:
Erin: “Looks like tomorrow is supposed to be the day something finally gets decided. ... This stupid hurry up and wait, then go, no wait crap is stressing me out.”
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March 16:
Dan: “We are living the high life with tents over our heads and sand in our faces ... We just keep crossing our fingers and pray that the Iraqis will take care of this problem for us. ... ”
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March 20, after ground war has begun:
Dan: “This game has started now, so we are going to finish it and get home soon.”
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April 23, after a month of fighting during which members of Mr. Kidd s unit stormed the bombed-out Republican Guard headquarters and helped seize the Baghdad airport:
Erin in Battlehard! newsletter:
“You may have heard that four of Bravo Company s soldiers were injured on Saturday, April 19th when a small girl tried to hand over a piece of ordinance (sic). ... SGT (Troy D.) Jenkins - most critically injured, lost three fingers off of one hand and one of his legs ...
“Please keep them and their families in your thoughts.”
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May 20:
Erin in newsletter to families:
“SGT Jenkins passed away . ... We will be sending savings bonds to his children ... ”
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Sept. 11:
Joseph: “gbhrbuggud ihsrsdbfdffffffff hdddfbdgdgfgg dvbjfxcbggjd hgbbjcggfhbjg cgufxbuhg cbcv
“Dear Daddy,
“I love you. I miss you. Kisses from the babies. Be careful. Come home soon.
“Love,
“Joseph”
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Sept. 12, by which time Mr. Kidd has been named commander of Headquarters Company:
Dan: “I want so much to just come home. It sounds like the babies are all growing up and I missing it.”
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Sept. 15:
Erin: “OK, I am beginning to wonder if you are mad at me or what? I know you said the Internet has been temperamental but your sister, mother and aunt all received e-mails that actually had some information in them and nada, zip, zilch over here. ...
“I am starting to feel really weird and wonder if you are really out there or if I just made up the fact that I even have a husband. You re just like this mystery man out there.”
(She asks what he thinks about them eventually running a franchise of the fast-food chain she works for. Then she tells him not to take the two-week midtour home leave being offered to troops.)
“All the guys that have had to come back really seem to be having a difficult time adjusting back to life here in the boring, trivial real world. ... don t take it or take it for R & R. It will screw us all up. I don t think anyone will really be able to adjust to that and then have you leave again. I love you and would of course love to see you, but I don t think anyone s psyche could take that kind of hit.”
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Sept. 16:
Dan: “As for the family and the Army, it is still in that order. ... I yearn for you, our family, a civilian life, and the ability to look at a clock and be able to tell when something ends. ... Please dont lose heart yet, we are almost there. ... ”
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Sept. 16:
Erin: “Thank you for the wonderful e-mail. ... It really confirmed what I truly felt and understood our relationship to be. It gets hard to know if you know what you know, you know? We are on the same page. I just wanted to make sure we were in the same book!”
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Sept. 16:
Dan: “We are not just on the same page baby, we are the same word.”
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Oct. 22:
Dan: “I think I m sick in the head or something. No matter how much this place sucks I cannot help but be happy. I am so utterly satisfied ... with life right now. ... I don t think it will matter what sort of job I have in the future, I feel now that everything else is a bonus.”
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Oct. 22:
Erin: “What a great upbeat note! ... We are doing surprising well here. It is amazing what you can get used to!”
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Nov. 20, days after 17 soldiers died when two Blackhawk helicopters from the 101st collided:
Erin: “Finished the (gift) boxes today. ... Stay Safe, only a few months left (I hope). Surely we will be stronger for this adventure.”
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Nov. 22:
Erin: “It is probably good that going into this we didn t know that it would be a yearlong ordeal. I don t know how mentally able I would have been to deal with it if I knew it would be stretching out before us for so long.”
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Nov. 27:
Erin: “Happy Thanksgiving baby,
“I am sorry you are not here with us, but am glad you are serving your country in a job that you love (or used to). I am grateful for our two healthy, smart, beautiful, semi-disciplined children and our marriage and our love that is stronger and fuller than ever. ... We have been blessed with so much.”
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Nov. 27:
Dan: “I am thankful for the Combat Water Survival Test at Morehead for putting you first in my arms. ... Out of our love, luck and life I would not change a thing, but there are plenty of days that I would like to relive over and over and over again. ... And the last thing I am thankful for is that the end of this hardship is near for all of us.”
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Dec. 9, the day a truck bomb left a crater at the gate of the 101st Airborne in Talafar, Iraq:
Erin: “I thought I was going to be sick when I read about the attack this morning. Just really brings it all to reality when you see it in print and they mention the city where you are ... in the article. I guess I have been living a little bit in denial lately, and sometimes it seems like a really great place to be.”
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Dec. 12:
Dan: “We are ... staying busy trying to be as preemptive as possible. ... We have a Christmas Tree in the bunker. Its sad but funny. It seems so out of place. We will decorate it with ammunition and smoke grenades.”
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Dec. 30, the day the Pentagon announced that portions of the 101st could begin returning home by mid-January, up to two months earlier than expected:
Erin, whose birthday is Feb. 16: “Your coming home will be the best birthday present ever!”
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New Year s Eve, 22 minutes before midnight:
Dan: “Happy new year. ... I am very happy to say that I will be in your arms, Murphy Permitting, within the next few months. My new resolution is to ... never spend this much time away from you and the kids ever again.”
First Published January 11, 2004, 6:26 p.m.
