If you’re a Buckeye alum, or you know one, you’ve heard it before. It’s not Ohio State University, it’s THE Ohio State University.
As in, not just any university. As in, THE most important.
Cue the eyerolls.
But now it’s not just a joke. It’s THE joke. Because now Ohio State wants to trademark “The.”
Earlier this month OSU officials applied to the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office to trademark “The” as part of the university’s name. Why? Because it’s not obnoxious enough to hear the university’s athletes and alumni emphasize the article when they say where they’ve studied?
Because university officials were aching to be the butt of late-night talk show monologue jokes? Because they felt like offering the University OF Michigan an easy opportunity to troll OSU on social media?
Those things happened, but, no, it turns out Ohio State applied for the silliest of trademarks for the purposes of protecting their trademarked merchandise like hats and sweatshirts when those products say “The Ohio State University,” instead of just “Ohio State University.”
The university has 150 trademarks in 17 countries. And it is famous for vigorously defending them.
From 2009 to 2017, Ohio State sued 14 entities for trademark infringement in U.S. District Court, opposed dozens with the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office, and sent hundreds of cease-and-desist letters. The university has gone after everyone from merchandisers and media outlets to a car dealership and a poultry farm for violating its trademarks.
Merchandise, after all, is big business at OSU. The trademarks are worth millions in revenue.
So, if you’re looking to grab up all the newly minted T-shirts and other scarlet-and-gray products emblazoned with the newly protected longer version of OSU’s name, everyone will know you’re not just AN Ohio State fan, but THE Ohio State fan.
They’ll still roll their eyes when you say it that way, though.
First Published August 20, 2019, 4:00 a.m.
